I have been thinking a lot lately, not unreasonably, about the things I would like to be doing. Things I would like to do if I were feeling better, and things I would like to do once I am feeling better. (That is right O, crankiest of pancreases, the day is coming, beware.) So, I thought maybe I would pen my reflections here. As the days seem to be speeding by faster and faster, leading into my surgery, and the doctors appointments get further and further apart, my level of fear rises. It’s focusing on the good things, the things I will soon be able to accomplish and try that helps me regain my composure.
1. Spin really excellent yarn using my hand spindle. My wonderful hubby gave me a hand spindle for Christmas last year, it was almost a month before my pancreas attacks became daily. I played with it and congratulated myself for spinning something slightly resembling thick rope after several hours. I would love to knit with some hand-dyed and hand spun lace weight yarn. I have finally learned to knit and crochet at a level where I feel like I could do justice to a lovely hand-spun yarn. Now its just a matter of getting the spinning under my belt. That being said…
2. Learn to use a spinning wheel. I have heard that there is no contest in the efficiency of using a spinning wheel, I can’t wait until I have the money to get a beautiful second-hand spinning wheel and invest some time and patience in to learning how to use it.
3. Make a hand spindle, knitting needles and a case for all my fiber art tools from scratch. That’s right, I want a matching set! With little clay ends, I am so excited to sit down and do this! It will take about $50 and a TON of patience. But using my hand forged tools will bring me so much joy! I can’t wait to knit my first shawl with my hand-made needles.
4. Learn to throw pots. One of my greatest regrets about high school is not taking a 3D art class. I don’t know when or how I decided that it was more important to take a second second language, but somehow I did. Now, I feel like I have a better handle on priorities and finally learning to throw pots is one of them!
5. Harvest Natural Clay for throwing pots. There are a lot of trends that I don’t really buy into. Localism, suffice it to say, is not one of them. I love the local movement, as far as I’m concerned it is the way we were “supposed” to live. Local honey has recently been proven to help with allergies (please don’t get me started on my aspirations to own a bee hive…) then there are the economic perks in buying local produce, but it is also safe to assume that things grown in the soil where you live will be richer in the nutrients that you need to survive in such a place. Also, it is just SUPER cool, to know that the things you are taking into your body and home are a part of the place you are from integrates you into the community and connects you with your city. For me it is a part of feeling “at home” with where I live, it literally becomes a part of you. So, I don’t have a real great health reason for wanting to harvest clay, but I figure it all fits together in one way or another. It’s just one more element in my fascination with seeing things through beginning to end!
6. Become a foraging expert. I love reminiscing about being a kid in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. One of my fondest memories is afternoons spent scouring the forest floors with my grandparents for ramps, morels, wintergreen, wild asparagus and huckleberries. Of course, much like with Halloween candy, someone was always there to inspect our spoils. This is an experience I desperately want to share with my future kids! Nothing quite compares to having a meal of steel heads, asparagus and morels that you found that day (and lets not forget the raspberry huckleberry crisp for dessert!). Mm, my mouth is watering just thinking about it!
7. Go on a survival trip. Mostly just to prove I could do it. I want to be dropped in the middle of the northern woods with a back pack of essentials and just go for it. Sleeping under the stars and catching all my food for a week.
8. Get a tattoo. I think this will come soon after my surgery. I toyed with the idea of getting a tattoo for years, but I never felt I had anything substantial enough to represent. Overcoming this illness and getting on with the rest of my life finally feels like THE thing. I’m not sure what my tattoo will be yet, or even when I will feel up to getting it, but I finally feel like there is a good reason to.
9. Make wine and beer from scratch, including home-grown/foraged ingredients. Yes, I know I will probably not be able to drink much wine after my surgery, but this is one that is going to stay on the list anyway. Someday I will make my own.
10. Invest in really making my company take off. I wish I could say that my company, The Historium wasn’t at a temporary stand still, right at the peak of my media exposure!! Unfortunately, the way I have been feeling, working two full-time jobs just hasn’t been possible. After this surgery is over, I will have somewhere between four months and a year that I will be unable to work, I’m truly hoping during this time I will be able to invest some serious time in determining where I want my company to go and how I am going to get it there.
Of course, there are so many (many, many, many) more things I can list that I would like to do, but this is a good start. A top ten if you will (or even if you won’t). I am not belittling or forgetting the things I’ve accomplished so far, but sometimes it is hard to remember that this will be over soon and keep that spark alive for the future. So, for me this is a little reminder! Something to focus on until the future gets here!